Dear Pregnant young Girl...

I am writing this letter to let you know that people will always talk, never be discouraged by them. I know, at this moment you are looking down at yourself; your self- esteem is very low. You are disappointed, you are even afraid to go to the public places because you think everyone is watching and discussing your behavior. In your mind right now is that you have let your parents and society down. You are full of anger and regret. You are trying so hard to focus on other things but you fail in every attempt.

You feel like you are in a dark world because you are walking around with shame and guilt on your shoulders. Everywhere you go; you cry, apologize but still feel like the world is watching you with eyes full of anger, shame and disappointment.  

I would like to advise you to stop living your life based on society’s expectations. Stop seeing your life through the eyes of the society. It’s about time you start seeing yourself through the eyes of God Lord our savior. You should know that it’s not everyone who would like to see you successful; at this very moment they might be laughing at you and saying nasty stuff about you.

Be still and know that God loves you even now that you are pregnant. Yes, you might be pregnant now but fact remains- He cares about you. All you need to do is to kneel down and tell Him how you feel, ask for forgiveness.

God wants you back; He wants to make you precious again. He is just waiting for you. Now, pick yourself up and run to Him with a big smile.

You’ve got to love Pretoria!!!

At first I never wanted to come to Pretoria. I thought it was dirty with prostitution, high crime rates, drugs & alcohol, etc. Johannesburg and Pretoria used to be my best enemies; the mention of their names was a worse nightmare to me. You just cannot believe when I tell you how in love I am with Pretoria at the moment.

The Central Business District is kind of what I have studied about in geography (settlement geography) in high school. Almost everything is here; the skyscrapers, tar roads in almost every street, glass buildings, and the streets are in gridline form, the list goes on. It is structured nicely and perfectly.
One thing I love the most is the implementation of the free Wi-Fi. Tshwane Free Wi-Fi has made our lives easier. It is increasing our opportunities to find jobs, bursaries, to do our things online; quick and easy. It (City of Tshwane) was recently nominated as the best free Wi-Fi provider.
There are a lot of clubs around the CBD and Sunnyside; you get confused to which one do you want to go to. Almost every street in Sunnyside has a different clubs. It is really accommodating people who like to go out more often. I shouldn’t forget to mention a million of churches around Pta, I get confused myself on Sundays.

Now let’s take a short and quick tour to some various places in Pretoria 
  

CBD

CBD

Union Buildings

Statue of Mr Mandela at Union Buildings

A lose is a big NO NO to Amakhosi this season

Kaizer Chief has made it clear through their consecutive wins that lose is not in their goals for this current season. They have found themselves and realized that they might lose fans and reputation they used to have.
They are the new mtn8 champions whereby they edged Orlando Pirates by 1-0. Tefu Mashamaite scored the winning goal. I am certain that they will go away with Telkom knockout cup. They are very promising and their performance is praised by almost everyone.
They have played 15 games and won all of them. Yesterday, 19-10- 2014, they have set a new PSL record for most wins in a row after beating Ajax Cape Town 1- 0. They are leading on the Absa Premier League.

Where is the truth about this Ebola thing?

Ebola appears to be a serious illness because it can be spread easily. HIV/AIDS is much better compared to it. We have condoms to protect us from getting HIV; we have ARVs to help treat the virus- now I call it a relief. It’s difficult and scary with Ebola because we haven’t discovered any cure or sort of a treatment. In the meanwhile, about 160 people are dying in a day. Ebola outbreak is most popular in 4 countries of West Africa; Sierra Leone, Nigeria, Liberia and Guinea.

Now, what exactly is Ebola?
People are talking! They are giving their own explanation. I've read somewhere online that Ebola is believed to be the results of bush-meat, particularly bats. Yes, we all know that eating bush-meat is popular across Africa but is this true? Some people on social networks assume that this hemorrhagic disease is scientifically engineered, like HIV, Cancer, etc. They say it’s a tactic the West people are using to depopulate black masses.
Basically, most people think that Ebola is a race issue.  Whites are saying this illness is from bush-meat and the Blacks say it’s scientifically engineered.

Life on the City

You should see the hectic traffic in the early hours of the day. People are moving very quickly from the train station, bus stops or taxis to their own destinations. They don’t even care about you; they will just roughly push you from pedestrian road intentionally with their big unmaintained bodies. You should just see those who are coming from the train, you would swear they were chosen; they have the same personality disorder. When you try to talk to them, they just ignore you like they don’t care, like you don’t even exist. These train passengers rarely speak to each other, I wonder why?

Now, listen to the irritating noise coming from the children who are going to school. Some will be filling your ears with their meaningless songs. You will find the other group of these ignorant learners shouting for no reason, laughing like they are in a competition of some sort. Others will be running as if somebody is chasing them. These learners though! Are they not well psychologically? Do they ever think of this distraction they are making in the CBD?

Oh! So now you think it will get better because you are in a taxi or bus? Hahaha...no! It’s only getting worse. You will find three big mommas with their bodies that actually consist of 99.9% of fat in the back seat of the taxi. Once they notice that your body is thin, they now want you to seat with them because they know they are going to seat comfortably and they don’t care if you comfortable or not; it’s just none of their damn business.

I miss this soul!

Photo by: Dieketseng Mothutse
Insert: Lelo showing her best of the best poses

Photo by: Dieketseng Mothutse
Insert: Lelo in her bright mood

Marriage saves us from many bad things

Marriage is regarded as a communion bounding two people together. According to Dominik Schoebi, Benjamin R. Karney (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2011) marriage is a covenant; not a partnership or a contract. A covenant is forever or until it can no longer be done, “until death do us part”. When you agree to marry someone, it means you are ready to commit yourself and be a wife/husband. This implies that you leave old stuff behind and focus on one partner; you also need to show affection to your partner now and forever more. See, marriage is not as easy as many might think. Schoebi & Karney (Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2011) say commitment means do what it takes to make the relationship successful. In a long-term relationship, both parties cannot always get their way.

Advantages of marriage

Although this commitment seems to be tough, I say it’s the best choice as well as experience. Your sex life is healthy since you both don’t have to go out dating different people. The highest levels of sexual satisfaction were reported by individuals who were married, monogamous relationships, while those who were single or cohabiting reported slightly lower levels of sexual satisfaction (Journal of Marriage and Family, Vol. 62, No. 4 (November 2000), pp. 999–1017). Also, you help each other financially, meaning that you will not struggle a lot.

Adultery has no chance

When you choose to be married, you avoid adultery as well. This is the reason why I would love to be married in the near future. With my whole heart I Hate with capital H older people (parents) who are fooling around. It’s sad and embarrassing to find out that your parent is dating somebody from your ex’s family. It makes you wanna disappear from this world and come back after a while. However, this whole mess can be prevented from happening by sticking to one partner.

Being a widow does not make you any special

I know some are widowed; it was never their intention to grow old alone. Even though nature (death) took your sweetheart away, it’s still possible to stick to one partner. Okay, I cannot be against dating, but I just feel that it would be better if you go for someone your age. I hate mothers who are into ben10’s, can’t they get appropriate guys? Please!! This ben10 thingy is annoying to the core.

Ladies… Please

Even if you have “baby face” or small body, ladies please go for your peers. You don’t have to know their age; you can tell if someone is your size by listening to how they talk, how they wear and how they do things. Imagine this; mother and her daughter have dated different guys from the same family not knowing? I do not know about you, but it does not sound good to me.

Same applies to men

Same goes to men; it is advisable to choose one person. Since statistics showed that most men are unable to stay without women in their lives, it is wise for a man to remarry if his darling passed on. A father who changes women like underwear is disrespecting and embarrassing his children. They get mocked and teased by their peers in the streets. This negatively affects both their self-esteem and self- concept.

Even the unmarried ones

To the ones marriage was never meant for them, those who say they do not want to be married. It’s fine, you can still be in a relationship with one partner. In this way, you are saving yourself and family the embarrassment.

It is slightly different with young people (Youth)

As for youth, please try and be faithful to your boy/girlfriend. Faithfulness is learned from an early age. Anyway, if you are still a youth, single and have no kids, you can experiment being a Ben10 or having one but don’t make it a habit. Being a youth means you are in a stage where you really have to explore, so that you can speak from experience with your children in your middle or late adulthood.

However, you need to be extra careful since there are various diseases out there and many dangerous things. Take extra care!!!

Radio Metro Personality, Eddie Zondi dies

This is very sad to take my precious time and write about another legend passing away. Last time I was actually supposed to pass condolences to two families but I thought it would be better if I write about Maya Angelou only and leave Shakes Kungwana out. The reason behind that is because I thought writing about too many deaths will make me appear thrilled.

Now I feel that I’m forced to write about the late Eddie Zondi because his death really came as a shock. I still am shocked even now and deeply hurt; it’s so unbelievable. He is a radio legend.

He died of heart attack; however, Sowetan reported that Kaizer Kganyago (SABC spokesman) could not confirm that Zondi died of heart attack. He had chest pains and was rushed to the hospital; sadly, he couldn’t even make it to the hospital. This shows how serious this was.

His death made many people to realize how short life can be. It also shows that no one knows his/her time, so you need to always humble yourself and do well in life.

Eddie Makhosonke Zondi died 47. He was the presenter at radio Metro, he is known by his famous “The Romantic Repertoire” show on Sunday afternoon, from 3pm to 6pm. He would always be playing chilled RnB music, mixing it with some useful and wonderful quotes and advices. His show was able to give people peace of mind for so many years.

I pass my deeply condolences to his family, friends and metro FM. I must admit that my Sunday afternoons will never be the same anymore.

I really wish that RIP could mean Return If Possible- May his soul rest in perfect peace

My cries

My cries for love,

My cries for peace,

My cries for blessings,

My cries for everything

I cry to God,

I cry to my ancestors.

Who will ever stop my cries?

An agony in my heart,

A torture in my life,

There are times of loneliness.

I cry for hope in my heart,

I cry for unity in my family.

What did I ever do?

My heart bleeds more than

Anything else in my body.

My questions are

Why was I created by God?

Why did my mother give birth to me?

Was I born to be tortured?

Was I born to suffer?

I’ve looked at the positives and negatives of this life

And I’ve realized that

Earth is a place of tolerance.

      ***The Author is Unknown to me***

Rest In Peace Maya Angelou...

A well- known American Poet and civil rights activist, Maya Angelou (86) passed away on the 28^th of May 2014 in her home, North Carolina where she has been living. The Guardian.com reported that her son, Guy B Johnson, confirmed the news in a statement. He said: "Her family is extremely grateful that her ascension was not belabored by a loss of acuity or comprehension. Her death was confirmed by a family member.

Her groundbreaking and health failures

Angelou will always be remembered by her groundbreaking I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings and On The Pulse of the Morning. In her life she got more awards. ‘Angelou had been honored with more than 50 awards, including the nation’s highest civilian honor, the Presidential Medal of Freedom’ said The Guardian. Due to her failing health, Times.com reported that she canceled a scheduled appearance at Beacon of Life Award in Houston where she was going to honored with an award. Also, she canceled to go to the library in Arkansas last month because she was admitted to the hospital.

Miserable childhood

She never had a smooth childhood like most of her peers. The Guardian wrote that at age seven, Angelou had to stand up in court and testify against her mother’s boyfriend who raped her mother. She used to travel between her hometown and Stamps, Ariz and this is where she experienced segregation for the first time.

What her family says

She was not just an ordinary citizen but a significant one. Her family is proud and grateful to have such a Legend as part of their family. ‘She lived her life as a teacher, activist, artist and human being. She was a warrior for equality, tolerance and peace. The family is extremely appreciative of the time we had with her and we know that she is looking down upon us with love’, a family member posted on her Facebook page.

She is a legend

She has started her career as an editor in Egypt and taught music and drama in Ghana. The Guardian reported that she expanded her career to film set, the stage and the lectern. Since she was a civil rights activist, she got a chance to befriend people of high caliber such as Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcom X.

New Cabinet for President Jacob Zuma

After been sworn for the second time, President Jacob Zuma made some few changes in his cabinet on the 25^th of May 2014 in Cape Town. However, News24 online wrote ‘this cabinet is considered as being able to drive socio-economic transformation forward, but the official opposition was decidedly less excited about the prospects.

Even though some other people are not satisfied about these few changes in the cabinet, ANC believes that it was a balanced and experienced selection. New24 online reported that Gwede Mantashe (ANC Secretary General) emphasized that the announced cabinet has the qualities needed to fight unemployment, poverty and inequality.

New Deputy President

The new Deputy President is now Cyril Ramaphosa. He takes over from Kgalema Motlanthe. The whole South Africa hopes he will do a good job.

DA is not happy

Democratic Alliance is not impressed with the new cabinet; they think President Zuma’s choice will not try and solve major problems in the country which are economic declination, poverty, corruption and unemployment. However, Hellen Zille (DA’s leader) told News24 that she is happy about the re-appointment of Aaron Motsoaledi as Health minister and Angie Motshekga as Basic Education minister.

Zille thinks moving Pravin Gordhan from finance minister seat is a mistake and it will have a negative influence on the confidence of international investors. However, many people in the country are thrilled to have the first black African (Minister Nhlanhla Nene) as minister of finance. Zille says they (DA members) hope that Nene will control government debt levels which seem to be rising recently. However, DA hopes that minister Gordhan will do well in his new Local Government department.

Defence Force stays with their minister

People from South African National Defence Force seem to be happy with Zuma’s decision not to change Minister Nosiphiwe Mapisa Nqakula. In social networks, more especially twitter, people say it is for the best because she will be able to continue with what she has started and maybe finish it.

People’s ideas about new Department

Zuma’s new cabinet has expanded with Telecommunications and Postal Services Department. It will concentrate on small business development and Lindiwe Zulu will be the minister for that department. People in different social networks think the new ministry will help in job creation since government will need people with skills to work for this new department. Also, News24 reported that the NYDA welcomed the establishment of the small business development ministry. ‘We are confident that young South Africans will benefit from this department’ said NYDA executive chair Yershen Pillay.

EFF is worried about the costs

However, one will always have to oppose what others are saying, in News24, EFF (Economic Freedom Fighters) told the reporters that they are concerned with the costs associated with the new cabinet. ‘The average expenditure on each minister and deputy for their cars, both houses in Pretoria and Cape Town, the protection services and transport exceeded R10m’ said EFF national spokesperson, Mbuyiseni Ndlozi.

I AM NOT AGAINST CREMATION THOUGH

I believe in the word of God, it says the day will come for the trumpet to be played and every dead person who believed will resurrect. 

I somehow think to cremate a corpse is against our religion (Christianity). I feel that if you are a Christian you should know better. Jesus was crucified on a cross, died and was buried, his body was never burnt to ashes. On the third day, he rose; see what I’m on about? How are you going to raise from dead if your body was burnt down to ashes, huh?

Reasons why some people choose to be cremated when dead

·        They avoid being woken up by others to use them in an evil way (witchcraft).

·        They don’t believe in the word of God.

·        They do believe in God but they are ignorant.

·        They choose to do it because others are doing it.

·        Because of their beliefs.

·        It is what they do in their culture.

Journalists

It is all in the details. Journalists spend so much time working on the details that they have become analytic about every detail in their own lives and yours. If you can’t provide the low-down, you may as well keep it to yourself. They are not stupid. A journalist can hold a conversation about almost everything, with anyone. If they don’t have a clue, they will spend entire time at dinner party interrogating someone who knows something they don’t. And expect them to correct you every now and then. They have an elephant memory. Be careful what you say to, or promise a journalist. They work with words and will remember every tiny detail. And yes, do expect them to quote you word- for- word quite often.

You can’t hide anything from a journalist. Don’t even try. They are trained to dig things up, read between lines, and read body language. Whatever you are hiding will be found out. Actually, they are perfect investigators because they know which questions to ask and when. “I keep six honest serving- men, (They taught me all I know); their names are: What, Why, When, Who, Where and How” Rudyard Kipling.

Reasons why you would love to be a journo:

1.      To be fluent in both written and spoken language.

2.      To be updated about almost everything.

3.      You are not limited to one profession but you tend to know about other disciplines.

4.      To have knowledge in investigating.

5.      To meet and network with most significant people. 

Are women weak?

Us, women, get worried about almost everything, even over small things. I think it’s in our nature to worry and stress too much. I remember when I was reading a certain diary on Facebook (Diary ka sindiswa) and they wrote that women are always crying over small things. This is true, because if your nail gets chipped, you cry, maybe your boyfriend does not call, you cry, you pass your exam, you cry still. All of these lead to both stress and worry.

I remember two months ago I lost my lip gloss and I got stressed to an extent that I cried. To think of it, lip gloss is not that expensive and it’s not like that was the only one I had, but because I’m a woman I got hurt and tears just had to roll down my cheeks. However, one thing I seem to like about being a female is the ability to calm ourselves down if we are in bad space. We just know how to deal with sadness or anger. We cry our lungs out, write everything down or talk to somebody.

Men are the reason women stress

I hate to say this, but one of the biggest factors that make most women worried is ‘men’. You know that moment when you expect someone to call and they don’t, it’s really frustrating. For example, let’s say you went to out on a date, and he does not call for about a day or two. This worries a lot of women, we end asking ourselves if we were not good enough or if we somehow turned him off.

The worst part is when he does not call after you have slept together for the first time or after a long time. Tjo, brothers we get extremely worried about that one ey. Please do not do it, at least sms us later on just to show that you care and make us feel better since we kinda feel embarrassed if you are keeping quiet. Also, this leaves us wondering if we did not impress you or maybe you just using us to satisfy your needs.

According to me, if he does not keep in contact after sleeping with you, he is not in love with you. His mission was to get into your pants and pass to others. My advice, ignore that nigger because he is not serious. I believe if you keep on showing interest in him, he is going to contact you only when he feels like shagging, and trust me; you do not want to be used!

Hair can worry you to the extreme

To tell the truth, guys are not the only main cause to our stress and worry. Hair can also be stressful. Have you ever had a hairstyle for about one or two months and when you suppose to take it off, you do not have cash? Damn! That’s stressing, believe you me, you are going to be deep in thoughts about what to do. This can lead you into unwanted debts because you will have to borrow money from friends. Sometimes we lie to our parents so that we can get that cash for our hair.

Lol, early this month, I too had to take the hairstyle I had off. I have a natural hair and I did not have money to do another style or simply wash it. Iyo, I was worried and stressed simultaneously. I was afraid to even go out of our yard because I felt like everybody is looking at me. I also felt dirty and because of that I thought I was ugly.

There is a Sesotho saying that I like, it says ‘mosadi ke mosadi ka maqheka’, it emphasizes that a woman always has a plan B if plan A does not go accordingly (tactics). This explains why some women would wear a scarf and make it a doek in a more fashionable way when times are tough.

Understanding can be helpful

Some think that women are weak since they easily become emotional. Brothers, no, we are not weak but that’s how were created. You just need understanding, that’s all.

I so wish men could just understand how emotional we are and do things right, I mean things which are going to satisfy us, but not stressing us. Imagine how good can it be if we live in a world whereby understanding one another is something that we practice daily. Even though now it’s difficult to achieve understanding, I will live by hope that one day it will happen. 

MEN AND A PHONE SEEM TO HAVE A STRONG RELATIONSHIP!!! 

Even if you can turn them down, ignore their calls, believe you me they will call you again and again. They just never get tired. I do not know where they get their stamina from and where their pride is. When it comes to girls, it is a different story because they have a huge a pride. It takes guts to call your ex-boyfriend or even the current one. It hurts their pride to take a phone and tell how they feel. It’s really not easy. However, research shows that this is caused by being afraid of disappoint. It carries on and states that girls don’t like spending their airtime on boys; they would rather use it on social networks. But for guys, calling seems to be as easy as ABC. For example, there is this other guy I know. He got dumped by his girlfriend with no valid reason. They have been separated for two months now, but the guy has started calling the girl already. The girl is not speaking to him in a pleasing way but this guy seems to be persistent with his mission. And then I wonder, is he not getting the message that this girl is not interested in talking to him or what? However, this behavior shown by boys is pleasing them girls to the core. It makes them feel special, they feel loved and appreciated. Even though girls would be complaining about this behavior, deep inside they know that they love it. But please, get it right boys, girls don’t get happy with all their ex’s, they choose who to be happy for from their past. Obviously, there are those who used to make them happier and they are the ones who are able to sometimes put smile on their faces. Not only men from intimate relationships, but every man in the world has this behavior. Perhaps it runs through their veins. For example, your male and female uncles are different in using their airtime to call. Female uncles usually wait for your callback message before they can call you, but as for the male ones, they call whenever they get time. 

 POSSIBLE REASONS FOR THIS BEHAVIOR 

•  Men are known to be brave, so they are not afraid of almost everything.  Unlike women, men don’t have pride. 
•  In eastern perspective, men are regarded as the heads, meaning that they have to lead in everything they do (calling, SMSing included) 
•  Most guys enjoy bragging about having many girls in their league. Therefore, after calling you, they run to their friends and tell them that you two are in speaking terms and you still love him, just that you in denial. Yup, that’s how awesome they are.
• They rarely do social networks, so their airtime is always on point and they use it to call girls.